How I Met Him

This post will explain how I initially met Mark, who later became my lover. (btw – I hate that term “lover”, because there was no love. But that is probably the subject of another post.)

(As with all of my posts I will be changing the names and any specific details that could identify the people involved.)

My husband works for a medium size bio-tech firm. He started with the company in the 1990s as the company was experiencing quite a bit of growth. He works in property accounting. While not a glamorous job, he has always seems to enjoy his work. It is basically the nine to five type of office job with pretty good benefits. He could probably make more money with a larger corporation, but I think he likes the family type environment on a medium size business. And that suits Jeff’s personality. He has always preferred stability over risks. I actually also share that trait.

One of the founders of the firm is Mark. My husband rarely had much contact with Mark. Mark is the CEO and my husband is more of a worker bee. However, as the firm is not that large (only a couple thousand people worldwide) most people know each other.

My only contact with Mark over the years was at various company social functions. These were typically company banquets or award ceremonies, that type of thing. People would attend with their spouses. And Mark was always there with his wife Lisa.

Mark has a reputation of being a rather flamboyant personality. (His business partner is actually the opposite in personality.) For example, at a formal charity banquet he showed up wearing a Hawaiian shirt and shorts. People either tend to find him obnoxious or funny. My vote was always for the former. Of course, as he is the owner, most of the people laugh at his antics.

Even though Mark is married, my husband told me that he had a reputation as a ladies’ man. However, everyone always excused his behavior by saying this was all just an act and his over the top flirting was just done tongue in cheek.

So even though I was prepared for his obnoxious manner, I still was taken aback when I first met him. It was at a formal end of the quarter awards ceremony. When my husband introduced me to Mark he literally looked me up and down. And I HATE it when men do that.

Then he turned to Jeff and said that he really married out of his league. After that snide comment, he looked back at me and asked me if my breasts were real! Mind you, this was in front of my husband and 15 or so people standing around with drinks in their hands. Everyone laughed, but I was offended. I could feel myself blush and I was SO embarrassed.

I am not a prude, but I hate to be objectified in such a manner. And it was not like I was wearing a provocative dress that exposed much cleavage. But instead of treating me like a person, Mark chose to have a laugh at my expense.

After we went home, I broke down in tears. I was hurt in being treated in such a manner. But I was mostly hurt that my husband did not protect me. My husband told me that I was being silly and I needed to get over it. He also said that there was nothing he could do because Mark was the CEO.

So I initially disliked Mark and I never overcame that dislike of him. But I knew that a few times a year I would have to interact with him at various company functions, so I promised myself that I would not let his crude comments bother me. When he made some stupid comment to me, I would now laugh and make a verbal jab back at him. I gave him the nickname of “giraffe” because he looks like a giraffe. He is tall and gangly with a long neck. This nickname actually stuck and Mark thought it was funny.

So over the years, Mark would never fail to make some flirtatious comment to me. But as he did this with most of the girls, it ceased to bother me. I learned to laugh and make fun of him in return.

Did I find Mark to be attractive? No, I always thought he look ridiculous. Did I find him sexually appealing? The very thought would have made me laugh!

But then Christmas of 2006 came and everything changed. I supposed that will be the subject of my next post.