Sorry that I have not posted in awhile. My original goal of this blog was to sort out my thoughts concerning the affair. And it was also to document my recovery. Unfortunately, I relapsed into the affair. As such, I did not see the point to continue this blog.
I have found that an affair is sort of like a drug addiction. I realize that it is destructive and harmful, yet I am addicted. I would guess that 95% of the time is miserable. But that craving of the “high” of the 5% is what is hard to break.
Like a smoker that quits a thousand times, I am always quitting his affair. I always tell myself “just one more time and that is it” but then I go back for more.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Oh Amy, I have been having an affair with the same guy for 10 years on and off back and forth. I know this is probably not what you want to hear from others. But you don't need to hear your naughty girl either.
ReplyDeleteI find everyone out here is very supportive and most won't judge you. Please don't stop writing I think you will find it helpful. Remember this is yours, your way to put your thoughts down and try and sort things out. Hope to see you again. I wish you all the best.
{{HUGS}}
You know.....that affair is an addiction. You cant seem to conquer it. I am also addicted. I often miss those crazy feelings even between meetings. Warm hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean - the addiction and the high...oh god that high.
ReplyDeleteI think if you want to be cured of your addiction then you need to just put one foot in front of the other and do it one day at a time, just like you would with any other craving. You may have relapsed, but if you really want out try to go cold turkey again.
Thinking of you. xo
By all means please keep posting. What I have found is that posting helps me see things in my situation that I would never have seen otherwise. And especially when your situation is really tough, it can be helpful to see it as clearly as possible.
ReplyDeleteAmy
ReplyDeleteI cannot tell you what is best for you.
I cannot tell you what to do with your life.
I will suggest that you take the time and think about the situation you are in now. And think about the situation you want to be in. Pray for guidance.
And pray to Christ to give you the strength needed to get to the situation you want to be in.
SO
Oh please don't stop writing. You don't have to have everything written in a perfect blog format from start to finish, just jump in and write. It will certainly help people like me. And it might help put your thoughts in order.
ReplyDeleteYour blog is perfect, but it doesn't have to be. I love to scrapbook, but am so worried that each layout won't be original and perfect. If I would just do it and not worry so much about how things are laid out, or what my original intent was it would at least be started, and the children would at least have something at which to look.
Will you at least give us a glimpse into what has been going on in your life, even if it is a bit chaotic?
Please don't feel too guilty about your whole self. Just remember the hypocrites never face who they are in the mirror. You really have a grip about who you are.
Hi, I am a male who had a long affair with a much younger woman---I understand your plight. However, you have absolutely no choice but to end it. It will eat you up. Also, there is no sense in sugar coating it---it is just plain wrong and you obviously know it. Besides the heartache and guilt, it is so exhausting, both metally and physically trying to balance both lives. I do not want to sound harsh but, as a devout Christian you know better. End it now and do not look back. You will be so much better off. Jim
ReplyDeleteAmy, I just discovered your blog and I'd really like to hear the rest of the story about how the affair progressed. It might help you by charting out the whole course and getting it in writing. But reading what you've written so far it seems obvious to me why it started, why it continued, and why you had a relapse. Ian
ReplyDelete